I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
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