It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Randomize
