For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
