My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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