Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
