I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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