I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
