I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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