In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
