He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
