sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
