Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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