Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize