Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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