Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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