do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Is it penis luge time yet?
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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