Will you blow on my dice?
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
