I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize