Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
