I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Randomize
