Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
So squirting runs in the family.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
