I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
