Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
