Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
