is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
You took a bar mat shot.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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