I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I am naked and annoyed.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
