Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize