He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
