hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
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