she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
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