have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
and i looked up. we had an audience...
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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