its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
