so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
