Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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