i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
