I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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