she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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