you guys were way drunker than both of me
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
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