The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
