need another drink. this is the easiest way
hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
