I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize