There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
