I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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