JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
