this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize