I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize