and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Randomize
