honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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