I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
