haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
