ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
